The Last Four Hours of My First Half Century

…Is being spent eating Toaster Strudel (Boston Creme and Raspberry!) and Fig Newton’s, watching “Australia” (for the second time), waiting for the second season premier of “Breaking Bad”, and having hilarious conversations with D-man.

D-man: “DeMommy? Yo birtday tomowoh?”

Me: “Mhmmm…”

D-man: “How owd you be? Fitty?”

Me: (cracking up) “Who told you that?”

D-man: “I dunno. Wan me sing to you?”

Me: (still laughing) “Okay. That would be great…”

He sings the entire birthday song and then says, “Fitty is owd.”

I scowl at him and then burst out laughing. He’s talking so well now. He said all of this without any prompts. Still, I’d like to know who gave him the number ’cause now he’s repeating it constantly.

Still… cracks… me… up…

Mojo is stuck to me like glue because he’s so happy he had a (four freakin’ hour) Day of Beauty yesterday. He looks adorable and smells great. And… I’m pretty sure he’s snuggling because he’s cold. Me? I’m feelin’ my fitty.

I worked today then came home and watched “Religulous” which I found completely entertaining, thought provoking, and scary as hell. S and I decided our position is that we have our doubts; humility is, evidently, important to our survival. Booyah! Loved the scene with the ex-gay. Puhlease, buddy… You is so, so gay!

I share my birthday with Barbie. I think it’s hilarious that they’ve just come out with “Totally Stylin’ Tattoos Barbie.” Yeah, me and Barbie are having a midlife crisis. I’m thinkin’ of getting more ink myself. Yo, Barbie; you go girl! Only difference between you and me is that, in 20 years, your ink will fade but at least it won’t stretch and fall. Gah!

So, yeah; four more hours of the first half of my life. My mom told me that 50 is the new 30. I told her I relate to 34 so, for me, it’s the new 34. Not that it matters; I’ll be asleep by 9, up by 4, out the door by 6, and home by 5. It’s a grind now matter how old you are.

Tomorrow is the first day of the rest of my 100 years of lack of solitude.

Ain’t life grand?

Fitty is sooooo not owd!