I have always thought those were the actual lyrics to Huey Lewis and the News’ “I want a new drug.” Truck~drug~truck~drug: to me it’s all the same ’cause….
I GOT A NEW TRUCK! (Hopefully it’ll be one that just won’t quit.)
And it’s a big’n. Mhmm… ’s got a Hemi (which really impressed my neighbor, Patrick; he even opened the hood to check out the engine) and leather and GPS (I will never get lost again) and chrome and bitchin’ speakers and the seats warm up and I can turn it on from inside the house and a tow thingy and it’s, it’s…. BIG.
How big is it? It’s so big, I can hardly haul my ass up into it. I’m thinkin’ it comes with Yoga as well due to the contorting position I have to get myself into just to “hop” in. Sweet! There’s even a button to electronically move the gas and brake pedals up and down. I feel like such a hillbilly drivin’ this thing as compared to my lil’ old 5 speed-stick Rodeo.
We took it for a little (220 miles) drive today. We went to Las Vegas. Um, New Mexico. And we figured out the Sirius satellite as we were driving. We were rockin’. Then, after a while, I about threw S and/or the whole damned thing out of the truck ’cause she kept changin’ the channels so much. Drove. Me. Bonkers. Then… KC and the Sunshine Band came on with “That’s the way I like it” and you should have heard all of us! It was hilarious. I was also able to get in a little disco-butt dancin’ and some kegels. Good times!
On the way home S asked me, “How’s that Hemi?”
Well, how the hell should I know but I said, “Oh, yeah, it’s Hemi’n” (We were doin’ 85 goin’ up a hill so I guess the Hemi was Hemi’n pretty damned gooo-ood.)
I feel like doing that Tim (The Tool Man) Allen guy-bark-thing only I sound ridiculous doing it while using the vanity mirror, doin’ 85 uphill, and slipping on a little lipgloss.
“Arr, Arr, Arrrrrrr… oopsie! Honey, hand me a tissue, will you please?”
*Bats eyelashes*
I need a name for this truck. I was gonna name it Mike. Dunno why. Then the navigation system spoke to me and it’s a woman. (Of COURSE the navigation is a woman… tsk!) She’s so darned pleasant when she says, “Left turn in a half a mile.” When I didn’t do it, she didn’t bitch at me, she simply reconfigured and gave me a new route. I think “Mike” may have just died in the middle of the road before admitting “he” didn’t know where we were going.
S has been singin’ country truck-drivin’ songs and “She Thinks My Tractor is Sexy” to me all day. That, in and of itself, was worth buyin’ the truck.
Soooo… she needs a name. Any suggestions?
Filed under: Pimp My Ride, She Thinks My Truck is Sexy, That's the way I like it, uh-huh
I bet PCH is beautiful from high up in the truck.
There’s only one way to find out!!!
Yes, your new truck is purrty. My new Rodeo is purrty. It all works out so nicely…
PS:
I told you it was a girl.
Erm loike one werd… “Huey!!!”
shitfire it don’t matter if it’s a girl…it’s a girl with some grunt.
HUEY!!
I have that song in my head now. The Huey Lewis song, not the KC and the Sunshine Band song. I’m not sure which would be worse.
I’m thinkin’ Sylvia … she silver … Sylvia. Beautiful. Yes, yes I am a genius … why?
Thank you Miss Capricorn.
I said the same thing, and she wrinkled her nose at me.
It’s the GPS Navigation voice. She sounds silvery, almost sexy, and not “computer animated” type of voiceover.
Of course Natalie, you could always name the truck Majel. That’s the name of the woman that did the computer voice-overs for Star Trek and Star Trek TNG.
That would be sooo cool..
(and you know, it totally works, since we go where no man has gone before… )
I’m thinking Ripley for the truck. After Sigourney Weaver’s character in Alien. Don’t be shy… pick a name that seriously kicks butt.
We have a little GPS with a female voice like that – the voice drives the boys nuts. For entertainment they change the languages in the system settings. I know the words for “right” and “left” in many languages now. Their favorite is Swedish.
What are you going to tow with her?
Great, now I have Toby Keith’s “I love this bar” song rambling around in my head…
“Mm, mm, mmm, mmm, mmm, I love this bar, yes I do!
I like my truck, (I like my truck),
An’ I like my girlfriend, (I like my
girlfriend),
I like to take her out to dinner;
I like a movie now and then:
But I love this bar,
It’s my kind place.
Just toeing around
the dance floor,
Puts a big smile on my face.
No cover charge; come as
you are.
Mm, mm, mmm, mmm, mmm, I love this bar.Mm, mm, mmm, mmm, mmm, I
just love this ol’ bar.”
Eh, better Toby than Huey when all is said and done.
All the really COOL trucks are named “Betsy”. Ask any Southerner.
Holy Hub would be oh holy jealous…
we just strolled by the neighbor’s house and he has a new schnazzy silver Nissan truck with heaps of chrome..
I dunno…I’m a gonna have to sleep on the name thing….
She sure esss perrty, that them thar truck of yers…
New rides for Q and S. That’s awesome! Since you were thinking Mike, you could go for Michelle. I always thought Michelle Rodriguez was a tough chick – Fast and the Furious. Or you could just name it Al.
The man’s dad named his truck Al. He’s had it for years and years, since the man was a boy. Anyway, I never realized the truck was named Al, I thought he was saying Owl. (It’s a southern accent thing.)
S: I would love to drive her on out to California… the beach and best friend awaits me. I don’t know about Majel, though. Sound kinda “sissy-fied” if ya ask me. lol
apo: She does have some grunt. That’s a great description. I dunno about Huey, though. I’ll always think of helicopters and Vietnam. I’ve seen way too many movies.
Cap: You and S (the capricorns in the room) both suggested Sylvia. It’s just not a name that I particularly care for and I blame that on someone I used to work with… not such a good memory. That would be like calling your cat “Cartman”, you know what I mean? However, I understand how ya got there what with that silver thing. I’d go Tonto before I’d go Sylvia.
Jeri: Ripley isn’t bad… I used to have the (shortened and bastardized) screen name of RIP. Hmm.. maybe not. What comes to mind is “Rest In Peace” and/or “Rip one.” lol
Erica: Besides my fat butt? Well, here’s the deal: I could tow a horse trailer… and that would be the ultimate, of course. Um, if it had a horse in it. Um, my horse… and her pet goat.
Lynn: Betsy is good except that I had a boss that I could NOT stand named Betsy. I’d call her Bertha before I called her Betsy…
Holy: She makes all the guys jealous which means I’m still not taken seriously cause it looks like I’m drivin’ my “boyfriend’s truck.” *sigh* Yeah, get back to me on that name thing. I’m sure you’ll come up with something Canadianly-heavenly.
Angei: Hey you! LTNS! Michelle isn’t bad but it’s kinda girlie, don’t ya think? We are still getting used to calling the Rodeo the Rodeo (versus the “truck”) and the truck the truck. It’s all so confusin’. She’s “the truck” for now.
Maybe I need to think about this like naming a puppy: wait until her personality emerges or morphs or I realize that it is actually just a …. T R U C K.
Hmmm…
Wow! that’s some kind of magical truck! holy crap. obviously she needs a sexy-but-ass-kicking name.
i vote SHEILA.
sexy lady from the outback who knows how to work it, but could gut something if she needs to.
Holy shit! That’s huge!
Enjoy your truck. I envy you. Most of the people in my neighborhood would beat me with sage sticks ir strangle me with tie-dyed fabric for driving something that big… you know, for contributing to the global warming epidemic or something…
Ha..
You forgot to mention that you get 12 highway MPG.. in that big bad arsed truck of yours..
Maybe you should call the truck Paula/”drunka” you know.. ?
“Somethin’s going on, but we’re not sure as to what..”
Q…
Have you come up with a name yet? Cause I’m thinking…Alison would be a good one. I just spent two weeks bathing suit shopping, am feeling miserable at how much weight I have put on in the last 3 years and I feel only marginally smaller than that big ol’ truck of yours.
Also, sometimes I feel like I need a Hemi to get me up the stairs. Alison. That’s your truck’s name. The similarities are staggering.
Seriously. I am thinking…Liv. Livie, Livia…Liv. Ooooh. thought connection…Liv=Liv Tyler=Don’t think I am competely mental for thinking that Steven Tyler is really hot=I love Aerosmith=I might listen to Love in and Elevator next.
p.s. nice truck.