"He Talk Pretty One Day"

The title of this post is very close to the title of one of my favorite David Sedaris books. I just love the man’s dry wit and humor. Oh, the part about his parents, well, mostly his father, and their beloved dog, just cracked me up! The title comes from David being in France and [...]

This n’ That

Watched GW last night. Watched Hillary on her webchat the last two nights.
Here are the highlights:

Nancy Pelosi was chewing on her lips and savoring the tidbits as she did everything she could to not have a look on her face. Better to waste good lipstick than show your cards.
Cheney was constantly pulling on his chonies. [...]

Clouds in my Coffee

The sun had to fight its way over the foggy mountains only to peek into a cold, misty valley filled with emissions from chimneys, cars, and industry. The sky filled with sepia tones choking on the city’s morning traffic rush. The cloud hanging low over the city was the same color as my now cold [...]

Things I Meant to Post

I was rummaging around in my word documents today and found something that made me laugh. At first I couldn’t figure out what it was until I read completely through it. I’m pretty sure I had the same reaction the last time I read it and that is why it was sitting in a folder [...]

Wiggled and Jiggled and Tickled Inside Him

So, this week, yon pseudo stay at home mom aka grammar/spell-check weirdo, has corrected two items from oldest’s report card and homework packet. His teacher is on my spell-check-from-hell-suspect-list. My thesaurus usage is at an all-time high. In other words: I’m keepin’ it simple and stickin’ with one or two syllable words in my notes [...]

Daily Humorscope

I read a lot of technical stuff and sometimes need a break just to be able to stay somewhat sane.
Here’s one of my daily chuckles:
Pisces (February 19 – March 20)Due to forces beyond comprehension, you will begin talking with a Texas accent. Eventually, you’ll come out with audio tapes to teach this to others, which [...]

Report Cards

Report cards came home today.
The good news is… the boys have improved.
The other news includes this comment written by the teacher in the subject area:

“… and his sentences make no sence.”

Well, I guess not.

Serial Family

I saw my father recently. I haven’t seen him in 16 years. No, he didn’t stop by and no, I didn’t go to his house. He lives in California. I haven’t had a relationship with him since I was about 10. My parents divorced when I was about 13 and although I’ve had a couple [...]

"How to Make Love Like a Porn Star"

Ah! I bet that got your attention! Here’s a redux from a post in another blog:I used to work in a bookstore. Yes, a bookstore; the very bastion of anti-censorship mentalities and perversions. I say perversions because you just would not believe the things people would complain about and insist that you remove from the [...]

Creating a Stink

I wear patchouli. If you wear patchouli, you need not read this… you already know.
There are only two reactions to patchouli. You either love it or you hate it. It either smells earthy, sexy, “somehow familiar”; or it smells like wet dog or wet, dirty socks.I have had every reaction to my essence. Everything [...]